Recommend a movie

[Vultural]

Drive-In Massacre - 1976 - 3/10

Grindhouse slasher that will kill you with boredom.
Couples at the drive-in start getting killed dead by a swordsman.
Piercings, beheadings, general dismemberment.
Killings are speedy and barely shown.
Frisky behaviour inside cars is PG, meaning nothing that would disturb a nun.
Though set in California, the acting corps have heavy East coast accents.
Which you will hear plenty of because everyone talks and  talks and talks and talks.

[Vultural]

The Headless Woman - 2008 - 3/10

In spite of a title like that, I knew what I was heading into with this Argentinian drama.  Serious arthouse territory.
While driving home, a woman's cellphone rings.  So, of course ...
She struck something. You can see a shape back on the road, but she is too shaken to investigate. Returns home, in a daze, instead.
Her world features dozens of relatives. Husband, brother, male cousins, many females, children. A "close" and confusing family. Close, as in a quickie with a male cousin, and a female niece with aggressive lesbian tendencies.
Minor characters such as doctors, gardeners, patients, random neighbors wander into the story, then disappear.
Confused? Yeah, so was our heroine. a meandering Virginia Woolf type.
Rich enough to suffer a guilt complex without having to face any consequences.
Definitely for the wine and cheese crowd.

[Vultural]

Made In Britain - 1982 - 7/10

Scoring this simply for Tim Roth’s ferocious performance.
He plays a high school skinhead, delinquent, spitting ball of hate and fury.
Because he is a juvenile, social agencies are still trying to guide him.
Like he gives a damn.
He knows there is no future for him because of class, wealth, expectations.
Everyone else is overshadowed by a blistering Roth, in this, his first film.

[Vultural]

Animal Kingdom - 2010 - 7/10

Young man is orphaned and moves in with his grandmother and uncles.
The adult men are hardened, armed robbers, laying low between heists, under surveillance by police.
This is not a high voltage actioner.  Animal Kingdom is a study in grim decline and the inevitability of Fate.
I'll confess, part of the draw for me was Jacki Weaver, Aussie croc-bait from 70's exploitation flicks.
She is mesmerizing as the woman who holds the men together in a sweet smiling, grip of iron.

[Vultural]

Le Capital - 2012 - 6/10

Slick financial thriller of high rolling executives.
When the head man of a massive French bank takes ill, he appoints a temporary boss.
His experience is limited and circling sharks eye him as chum.
Worse, a wealthy American hedge fund buys controlling interest in the bank, then sets up traps.
Unlike similar movies - say Big Short, there is no spoon feeding to viewers.
Maneuvering occurs across continents and conference rooms.
Temp Boss proves a cynical calculator, though there is a love angle, stupid beyond belief.
Root for villains because that is all there is.

[Vultural]

You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger - 2010 - 5/10

 God ... Has it really been thirty years since Silence Of The Lambs was released?
Yes it has been 20 hard years, going by Hopkins' physical appearance.
He plays a man suffering a mid-life crisis, who divorces his wife (Gemma Jones) and subsequently marries his rent-by-the-position B-girl.
There are four or five plots working simultaneously, featuring Antonio Banderas, Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin.
This was not a comedy, nor was it one it one of Woody Allen’s darker films.
This was an odd construction, more about individuals losing their way.
The voiceover was invasive.  The narrator was clearly American, yet the film was set in London.
Moreover, the narration did little to advance the plot or provide illumination.
It merely echoed the obvious.

[Vultural]

If Walls Could Talk: The History Of The Home - 2011 - 6/10

Four part documentary by Lucy Worsley focusing on four rooms in the home.
Living room - Bedroom - Bathroom - Kitchen
Evolution from Medieval time to modern age.
Informative, entertaining, full of catch-phrase origins:
“By hook or by crook” - “Walls have ears” - “Burning the candle at both ends” -

[Vultural]

Death Note - 2006 - 7/10

Japanese winner.
I haven't had this much fun since Battle Royale, the first one.
A wonderful chess match, horror film. I say horror loosely, as it is also a thriller, a mystery and a detective show.
Light inherits the Death Note. Anyone's name written in the book will die. Light targets criminals. The best intentions lead astray.
"L" spearheads the search for Light's secret identity.
Move followed by counter-move.  Wildly popular, great flick.

[Vultural]

Murdered By My Fiance - 2016 - 5/10

Slight doc about murder of author Helen Bailey and her dog!
Boyfriend reports to police four days after she disappears.
Despite Bailey being a best selling author, barely any video of her.
Detectives, analysts, neighbors, and the fiance.
Unexplained - why Fido was killed.  Unexplained - relationship.
Why is it “murdered by my fiance"?   As if the dead author produced this.
Find something else to waste an hour.
Otherwise, example of how not to kill someone.

[Vultural]

Les Demoiselles de Rochefort - 1966 - 5/10
AKA - The Young Girls Of Rochefort

Man, what a disappointing howler.
This was followup to The Umbrellas Of Cherbourg.
Seaside village prepares for the end of summer fete, as the French version of carnival arrives.
Looking for love are Catherine Deneuve and her real life sister Françoise Dorléac (who died tragically young that year).
Also on hand, dancing away, are George Chakiris and Gene Kelly.
Dancing is an understatement, the film is almost nonstop choreography.
Numerous songs by Michel Legrand, none truly memorable.
The movie gets exhausting after awhile.  The impression is that everyone tried too hard.

[Vultural]

The Monster - 2016 - 5/10

Arthouse horror, allegory overlay, mother - daughter issues.
In other words, menfolk - beware.
Dysfunctional, alcoholic, abusive mother drives neglected young daughter to her ex.
They are supposed to depart at 8:00 AM, except hungover Ma doesn’t get rollin’ until 4:00.
Soon as they hit the spooky backroad, rain starts pelting down.
The car strikes a wolf and the subsequent crash means they are stuck.
Before you can say - “Hey, where’d that wolf go?” - the girls realize trouble is mounting.

Acting by the female leads is terrific.  I hated Mom, pitied the small girl.
The pace is too measured to hold interest for most, though.
No backroads I’ve been on ever had streetlamps, let alone three of them.
Plus, after you crash your car, switch off the headlamps and wipers!
I should not have to explain this to sorry drivers unless they want to be future meals.

[Vultural]

Forbidden Lie$ - 2007 - 6/10

Norma Khouri penned the international bestseller, “Forbidden Love,” about the honor killing of her best friend, Dalia.
Then an Australian journalist exposed the book as a hoax.
This movie follows Khouri back to Jordan, where she repeatedly alters the story, dates, names, places.
She always has a new explanation, a fresh excuse.
Discoveries mount, old sins are exposed.
Fascinating film.

[Vultural]

K*a*therine Ryan In Trouble - 2016 - 6/10

Standup comedian on relationships, being Canadian in UK, men, family.
Hit n miss, with more hits, but this is chuckle material.
Timed correctly at one hour.  Nothing stale, just not my type of humor.

[Vultural]

2017 Oscar Nominated Shorts - Live Action - 2017 - 7/10

Five of ‘em.  Two crowd pleasers, two “serious” works of outsiders in Europe, and one pass.
“Sing” is about a competitive grade school choir.  This will resonate with those who have been in band or choir, especially if you were in the 3rds or in the back rows.
“Silent Nights” follows a refugee in Denmark.  Sent me a mixed message on how to score money from guilty rich.
”Timecode” watches bored security guards dance before surveillance cameras.
“Ennemis Intérieurs”  (Enemies Within) is another story of outsiders.  This time an Algerian, living in France for over 30 years, finally seeks citizenship.  Why wait so long?  And who are your associates?  Claustrophobic, Orwellian.
“La Femme et le TGV” features Jane Birkin as an aging woman exchanging letters with the engineer of the high speed TGV express.  She seems locked in the bygone, analogue age, with her manual typewriter, rotary dial phone, china tea set.

[Vultural]

Donkey Punch - 2008 - 5/10

Another dead teenager plot.
Seven Brits, vacationing in Mallorca, hook up for a night of booze, drugs, and mattress action.
Aboard a yacht, no less.
When rough sex leads to accidental death, paranoia mounts ... as does the death count.
Characters had IQ's smaller than a sea sponge, tho they were inventive with choice of weapons.

Note: Try to find subs. Characters, from Leeds and N England, had strong accents and were not always understandable.

[Vultural]

The Love Witch - 2016 - 5/10

Warning - Existential oblivion seekers, not this one.

Wish I could say I viewed this by accident or this was airing in rehab.
No.  Reviews mentioned bygone Technicolor productions, and I foolishly hoped for Douglas Sirk excesses.
Admittedly, I do have a taste for over-the-top folly.  This is not “so bad it’s good,” but it veers close.

Artist witch moves to Eureka, into posh Victorian manor, to get over issues with her ex.
Like glamour girls everywhere, our attractive witch has trouble pulling guys, so she casts sex magick for bait n mate.
After sessions of heightened debauchery, spent males collapse and die.
Oh, well.  There’s more guys with organic wands where those came from.
And she gets busy.

Lush and saturated colours throughout.
Females, wearing gowns and hats, congregate in a fantasy fern bar, nibble cakes and tea, while a harpist plucks.
Our witch sports a hairdo Bobbie Gentry would envy, as well as retro blue eyeshadow which I have not seen since the 70s.  (Car buffs - a 60s Mustang and a big ass 70s Impala stand out amidst boxy modern rides.)
Fair amount of frontal nudity, male and female, mostly during wicca ceremonies.  Chanting, not panting.
More graphic are her sketches and paintings.
Romping and rutting is freaky psychedelic time, drowned with overloaded grind music.
Acting is stilted and wooden across the board.  Characters read lines, never react.
My theory:  There was only one camera, so the director shot actors one at a time, then spliced.
At two hours, this movie is also too long.
I enjoyed, but, I have fondness for cheesy flicks.

[Vultural]

Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitation! - 2008 - 3/10 or 8/10

Great documentary of Australian gonzo, exploitation films from the 70's on.
Car crashes, nudity, cheap ripoffs of current hits.
These paved the way for Mad Max and top fare of today such as Wolf Creek and Storm Warning. Hosted by Quentin Tarentino.
Grindhouse fans, prepare to enjoy.
Arthouse crowd, run for your lives!

[Vultural]

20th Century Women - 2016 - 7/10

Coming of age story, time/location specific to 1979 Santa Barbara.
Ma (Annette Benning) asks two other females to help raise (watch over) fatherless son.
What really occurs, however, is the three females work out bad stretches using the son as listener, witness, Greek chorus.  The teenage boy is fine because, unlike a man, he simply listens instead of trying to “fix” problems.
Talky, yet this does not drag.  Should girlfriends load this, guys ought to be able to tolerate.
I caught a few minor errors, probably because I was in Southern California in the mid-late 70s.

[Vultural]

Fast And Loose - 1939 - 6/10

Breezy sequel to 1938‘s Fast Company.  Same characters, different lead actors.
Eccentric collector hires rare book dealers to buy rare Shakespeare manuscript from financially strapped tycoon.
There is also a first edition Milton that goes lost then found then lost.
Parties meet at the mansion, along with offspring, stock broker, gangsters, eventually the police.
Correcto mundo.  Killing.  For books!
Fast paced, a jumble of characters, assortment of motives, a plot that borders on gibberish.
Rosalind Russell and Robert Montgomery endearing as book hounds.
Amusing to see folks get riled up over the printed word, since so few buy actual books nowadays.

[Vultural]

Wild Wonderful Whites Of West Virginia - 2009 - 2/10 or 9/10

Long awaited sequel to Dancing Outlaw, which made an unlikely cult star out of Appalachian mountain man,  tap steppin', Jesco White.
This time out, the whole clan is featured.
Cussing, fighting, breeding, shooting, stabbing, nudity - male and female.
Will thrill fans and horrify the unwary.